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Should I stay or should I go?

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Well, the guys are planning on going to Stonyford this month for four days.

I'll be the ONLY novice and the ONLY girl. Talk about intimidating. I really feel like I'm gonna be in the way.

And well, compared to all the guys, I suck at riding. Would you stay home or would you go?

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I'd stay home and go do my own thing. I hate holding up a group if there aren't other riders at near my same level. I don't care if I'm the only girl, but I care if the group will be waiting on me all the time.

That's just what I'd do!

If I lived anywhere near you, I'd come over and we'd go riding! 😢

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depends on the guys. how long are you up to riding for? is there a comfy place for you to hang out if you decide to bag early? are you going with a significant other? if i were your significant other, and you wanted to ride, i would try to arrange it so we could start out earlier and get a couple hours of riding in before meeting everyone else, then maybe ride with the group for a couple hrs and then maybe you could hang out in the sun and sip cool drinks while waiting for the guys to do the aggro guy thing for a bit. that's one possibility anyway.

also depends on how much rest you need. when i sucked more than now (i was really really slow) i still rode with fast guys occasionally, but i was in good enough shape that i never needed to rest, so i could always catch up when they stopped to chat, smoke a bowl, etc...

just re-read your post, it's a 4-day trip! i would for sure go. you should be able to get plenty of riding in without holding everyone up and maybe you'll meet some other folks up there closer to your level too.

mw

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I say go if the group is okay with it. I am usually the only girl in the group I ride with. In the beginning, I would go at snail pace and didn't have a lot of skill compared to the others. My hushand and friends were very patient and good about teaching me to ge better. I say compromise. If you are going out for 4 days there is a lot of riding to be done. Let the guys go out for their fast pace, rough terrain ride. Then you ride with the group. Riding with better riders can really be a great way improve your own skills. Guys are pretty good about saying what they mean, not like us ladies. 😢 If they invite you and say don't worry they will help you out. They probably mean it and I would take them up on it. 😢

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Talk to them and see what they think, see if they mind planning on taking at least one 'cruise' a day with you ... just don't expect to go on every ride (I know you don't, anyway!)... go for small rides around camp by yourself, take your dog & go for a hike, and/or bring some reading & relax while they go on the more 'intense' rides. You'll get better by going with more advanced riders, and EVERYONE starts as a novice... seems to me it would be a shame to miss out on some fun riding just because you're new! 😢

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How well do you know the people you are going with?? Would they wait up for you, or would they keep on going? If you have a good friend going too, then I would say go, but if not, I would say take those 4 days and practice at home. At least either way you'll get bike time.

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Normally, when it's a guy trip I stay home and let my husband enjoy himself without having to worry about me.

But this is a four day trip and they are renting a trailer. (tent camping in freezing cold and rain sucks.)

But I don't know ANY of the people going except for my man and one his friends. They also want to camp at a campsite that the only way to the trails is a bad black diamond area. So they would either have to ride my bike out for me or would have to change camping areas.

And I know I wouldn't be able to keep up. Plus I've been sick for almost a freeking month and there is no way I'd be able to regain my strength in 10 days. Normally I'm only good for a couple of hours. I know it sucks but that's the way it is. I have fibromyalgia and that's just the way it is. But I'm the only girl I know with fibromyaglia that is willing to ride a dirtbike. In fact I'm the only girl I know with fibromyalgia that gets up off her ass and does stuff.

And the MAN didn't express any outstanding desire for me to go, either. Sigh.

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Normally, when it's a guy trip I stay home and let my husband enjoy himself without having to worry about me.

But this is a four day trip and they are renting a trailer. (tent camping in freezing cold and rain sucks.)

But I don't know pretty ANY of the people going except for my man and one his friends. They also want to camp at a campsite that the only way to the trails is a bad black diamond area. So they would either have to ride my bike out for me or would have to change camping areas.

And I know I wouldn't be able to keep up. Plus I've been sick for almost a freeking month and there is no way I'd be able to regain my strength in 10 days. Normally I'm only good for a couple of hours. I know it sucks but that's the way it is. I have fibromyalgia and that's just the way it is. But I'm the only girl I know with fibromyaglia that is willing to ride a dirtbike. In fact I'm the only girl with fibromyalgia that gets up off her ass and does stuff.

And the MAN didn't express any outstanding desire for me to go, either. Sigh.

Oooh, k. Then given the whole picture, I'd agree with the others, might be best to sit this one out. Unless, again, you're into camping and don't mind minimal riding. but I'd talk to hubby, sounds like he's looking for a 'boys' weekend, maybe?

Wish you lived down here, I'd ride with you!! 😢 You've got spunk! 😢

😢

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Normally, when it's a guy trip I stay home and let my husband enjoy himself without having to worry about me.

But this is a four day trip and they are renting a trailer. (tent camping in freezing cold and rain sucks.)

But I don't know pretty ANY of the people going except for my man and one his friends. They also want to camp at a campsite that the only way to the trails is a bad black diamond area. So they would either have to ride my bike out for me or would have to change camping areas.

And I know I wouldn't be able to keep up. Plus I've been sick for almost a freeking month and there is no way I'd be able to regain my strength in 10 days. Normally I'm only good for a couple of hours. I know it sucks but that's the way it is. I have fibromyalgia and that's just the way it is. But I'm the only girl I know with fibromyaglia that is willing to ride a dirtbike. In fact I'm the only girl with fibromyalgia that gets up off her ass and does stuff.

And the MAN didn't express any outstanding desire for me to go, either. Sigh.

Oooh, k. Then given the whole picture, I'd agree with the others, might be best to sit this one out. Unless, again, you're into camping and don't mind minimal riding. but I'd talk to hubby, sounds like he's looking for a 'boys' weekend, maybe?

Wish you lived down here, I'd ride with you!! 😢 You've got spunk! 😢

😢

Thanks!

So I'm not being overly sensitive. That's good to know.

Wow, I think I should proof read a little more often. Sorry!!

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Nice Clash Reference!

If there were 4 of my friends going and one novice girl, I dont know about any of you, but bringing someone slower and showing them a good time(litterally!) would be fun. I've done that with Rebecca, and she's good about saying "Uncle", or "slow down". Kind of makes us think before just taking off. Dang! It makes us a little responsible too. We have no problem going slower than normally, as long as the slower people are having a good time. That's how you get novice riders up to your level. Teach them. There's a lot of fun stuff you can do when riding behind someone slower and still get that workout! I'm far from being an expert when riding with Flynall and son "Q", but I'm not that far behind! 😢

Where was I? Oh yeah, at work acting like I'm working. 😢 I'd talk to them like mentioned above, and see what they think. Tell them to be honest with you, and if you have a blast, then go with them again sometime. If they are going to hard places do a self check and see if you're up to tackling something new.

Go and have fun. If you don't go, you'll never know! 😢

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I would have to agree with L2F after hearing the whole story. Stoneyford is such a great place to ride. You should talk to your hubby and see if he will arrange a ride to Stonyford when you are feeling better. Maybe have it be just the two of you, and maybe some other riders that you are comfortable with. Try and get away for a day or two and camp in a spot that is better for a beginner to still access some good trails. 😢

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I saw go. You don't get better unless you push yourself a tiny bit each time. My hubby is good about talking me through the tough stuff to show that I can do it. Once I've done it, i feel great and am ready for next time.

I also worry about slowing everyone down - like the group of 10 guys that rode the 2 day La- Barstow to Vegas last year. They were awesome and were glad that I was out there enjoying!

If your feeling up to it - go & enjoy!

Lisa

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DEFINITELY GO WITH THEM...because Stonyford is easy stuff. Yes they have some hard stuff, but they have everything from fireroads to double wides to smooth single track ... It's a huge place and the fire road goes up the mountain so if a bike brakes down you can get down easy..just go.... the camping is moderate to sucky - they have bath rooms and a sparce trees... it gets cold... but hey hang out build a fire pit and talk stories with the guys... You can go easy the first day then push it more Lots of terrain and lots of options.... THERE is some enduros next weekend so it would be crowded and I understand it snows up top..

But go ahead and go. Stonyford is nothing to be afriad of at all. MXCHIC can do it, I know she can. you can too DRZ gal 😢

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I dunno, when I was learning I took my cue from the person sort of 'responsible' for helping me out... and she said "And the MAN didn't express any outstanding desire for me to go, either. Sigh" AND they're parking in a place she can't get of by herself AND she normally doesn't go... I'd be feeling a little 'sensative' about being welcomed, too!! Just ASK HIM CLEARLY (remember, guys are HORRIBLE mind readers! 😢) if he thinks you should go, and is willing to help you out a few times... then go with that answer and don't worry about it any more! 😢 Does sound like a cool place... wish I could go!! 😢 :cry:

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If you don't go, will you wonder if you should have gone? If so... then just go and take a great book and, if nothing else, you camp, read and get in some shorter easier rides (time on the bike). Not such a bad weekend in the scheme of things in my books.

Best case scenario? You get in some wicked excellent rides!!

Having said all that, I must confess that the last person I gave the worst case/best case scenario to (thus talking them into going riding with me on a rainy day) ripped her ACL so what the heck do I know? 😢

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I dunno, when I was learning I took my cue from the person sort of 'responsible' for helping me out... and she said "And the MAN didn't express any outstanding desire for me to go, either. Sigh" AND they're parking in a place she can't get of by herself AND she normally doesn't go... I'd be feeling a little 'sensative' about being welcomed, too!! Just ASK HIM CLEARLY (remember, guys are HORRIBLE mind readers! 😢) if he thinks you should go, and is willing to help you out a few times... then go with that answer and don't worry about it any more! 😢 Does sound like a cool place... wish I could go!! 🤣😢

classic mind reading example: Woman says to man driving the car, "honey are you hungry?" Man says, "naw"

😢 :cry:

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Torn ACL is why I wear Asterick Knee braces. I tore mine playing Basketball, but still it sucks and takes a long time to heal, and you never get back to 100%.

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Yep, got two aftermarket knees and I wear a pair of Asterisks now too.

I second the asking him clearly. If it is a "guy ride" then let them have their fun; if not, by all means log in some seat time! And, if it is a guy ride, then round up your own crew and hit trails without him. Don't sit around at home on a weekend!

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Pardon me for asking, and PLEASE don't anyone get offended, but did your MAN invite you to go? Generally we say what we mean, although some of us have gotten enough experience in these matters to not say anything if we're fairly sure it's gonna upset our significant other. So if he didn't invite you, and obviously he knows you ride, he probably doesn't want you to go. Maybe he's concerned you aren't recovered enough yet for the trip, or maybe he just wants some time with his friends. I'd say ask him AFTER reassuring him you won't be hurt if he doesn't want you to go. As for holding back the other riders, I seriously doubt that would be an issue. I'm sure they wouldn't mind, and it will help you be faster for the next trip. If anything they'll be jealous of your man for having a woman who rides!

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Just ASK HIM CLEARLY (remember, guys are HORRIBLE mind readers! )

L2F, thanks for posting that line!

Let us know how the ride went, because I bet you're going. Be sure to take pictures and post them here. We LIKE pictures! 😢

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