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Aaaahhhhh, the drama....

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Grand Master

DRZCatastrophe

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So, TODAY I found out that apparently the "wives" have a problem with me going the the "guys" riding and camping. And the trips that I went on that only the "guys" were there, and I was the only girl, I apparently wasn't wanted. And that's why there hasn't been any more trips we've been invited to because Pete would want me to go. :banghead::banghead:?

God, I'm so sick of drama. I HATE women and I AM a woman!!!

I just want to be outside and ride a bike or a horse or just DO something besides sit on my butt doing their stupid stuff!! They all quilt and sew and are so domestic!!!

I'm so disgusted I ALMOST don't want a bike anymore and want to hide out in my house and never talk to these people again. ALMOST. Damn them. Why should I have to give up what I like to do just to fit in???

Sorry, ranting, I feel very small and stupid and sick right now and I didn't know where else to go. ??:busted::busted:

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RoostVixen

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Oh I am sorry to hear about what happened to you, but I can sympathize. Some women just DON"T GET IT. Face it, you're different, women don't take kindly to an undomesticated soul. I ride out here alot, mostly with my husband, but on occasion we do ride with other males (of the single variety) I have run into the very problem you describe often, but so far it hasn't involved my dirt bike. ( I used to drag race, and boy oh boy did the women hate me there!!!!) Just do your own thing, don't give up riding and for god sakes, don't start getting domestic. :banghead:

Maybe you guys can find another group of people to ride with.....

Well I'm off, gott go to the quilting show now.......???:banghead: (just kidding) I'm off to the motocross track to take pictures, and YES, I have a pile of laundry to do, but that can always wait till another day, first things first, ya know.

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Alaskan_h230_gurl

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I can understand.

My husband and I both ride. I however did not have the same problem as you.. what I found happening, is the girls I hung out with before I got my bike, slowly stopped hanging out with me, because, I WANT to talk about riding, and what not.

So I rarely get invited.... It's hard to find girls that like to do it all.. I enjoy crocheting and riding.. I am well rounded in that sense I guess... (although I'd much rather be riding)

I just say, SCREW them.. If they reason They don't want you to go is because they are insecure in their relationships, tell them to shut up and get a bike.

:banghead: Good luck!

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SXGalCRF250R

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Sorry to hear about that. Women SUCK! I know the feeling of being the only girl with a bunch of male riders, so far I haven't had any run ins with any wives. In fact, none of the wives/girlfriends even come out with most of the guys. Hell, I don't even know if half of them are single or not. You just need to find a group of people who have that, "I don't care" attitude about the petty crap and go ride and have fun.

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Grand Master

DRZCatastrophe

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Well, I THOUGHT we DID have that kind of group. We even asked if everyone was comfortable with me being there.

Apparently the guys were ok, but the wives weren't. Or at least I think that's what happened.

So I am pissed that whomever out there didn't have the balls (figuratively) to step up and tell the truth the first time.

Whatever. :banghead:

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chewgravel

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I can so sympathise with you. When I got my first bike a couple years ago I fell in love. Hubby enjoys riding, but really not nearly as much as I do. So quite often I rode alone. Well then, neighbor on same street saw us having fun with our bikes and even though he hadn't ridden a dirtbike in years, decided to buy one. Now I had been friends with he and his wife for years. Mostly with wife as we have another common interest. Well this guy used to be one heck of an MX rider and very quickly gets back into kick butt form. So, I REALLY want to ride with him. OK, pretty far behind him on my wimpy little bike, but that's OK. Once I catch up I can watch him at the riding area. Sitting and studying his jumping form and turning, I watch and then practice. I am improving and really enjoying myself. If he stops for a break he might give me some tips or say I am doing better, but we don't spend alot of time talking, just riding. ANyway after a week or so of heading out at the same time I am getting the cold shoulder from his wife (my friend) :banghead: I really don't get it. Don't catch on quick at all because I just don't think the way she does. Note: we have both been married over 15 yrs. (I personally wouldn't trade my hubby for anyone, and no he doesn't read TT). So a short time goes by and I decided to ask him is ---------- mad at me for something? And he explained it to me. He thought she was being foolish because he had never done anything to warrant her concern yet other men had. I was really crushed. But I decided it was dumb to let it go on like it was and talked with her about it. I let her know that her husband had never been anything but a friend and that being a firefighter I personally tended to have more male friends than female. (read not domestic) She claimed that she trusted him and me, yet she just didn't feel it was right for a male and female to go off alone. Though my feelings are still hurt over that, I have to laugh wondering if she was thinking we were stripping off all that gear and going at it on a bed of cactus and sticky burrs.

So I don't ride with him anymore. WHich really sucks because I learned alot and could continue to learn. But I am keeping the peace.

I really feel for you. But I think there are some women who are just of that mind set. There isn't much you can do to change that. And there is not much the guys can do. They have to live with those women and therefore you lose. Try to find more women to ride with or at least single men. LOL! And lucky for you Pete is like my guy. He gets it. For crying out loud we just want to ride!

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Grand Master

learning2fly

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Ah, damn, girl, that sucks. I can't believe they're even pissed off with Pete being there... thats beyond any issues of 'propriety' of being with their guys alone or something (which I still think is stupid, but based in insecurity and something you can work around by being in groups, etc)

But being pissed when you are WITH Pete, and camping with a group?? That is SO lame... just because they don't want to go, you shouldn't? :banghead::banghead:?

Girlfriend, it isn't you that should feel small, its them... thats the kind of catty crap women often pull, they probably sit around pissing & moaning about their guys when they 'leave' them to their knitting (and why don't they get off their lazy butts and at least go camping with their guys, if it bugs them so much?), but because YOUR guy WANTS you there, they are nothing but jealous or something...?

Its not you that should feel small, its THEM. Small minds and big mouths unfortunately go together WAY too often!

I don't know how this info got passed on to you, or what the end result is going to be... its complicated, I'm sure, being that these are Pete's friends as well... but certainly don't quit riding because of this! Maybe try camping next time with just you & Pete, and that'll open up opportunity for you two to meet other riders, maybe other women riders, too, that will be GLAD to have you along! One door closes, another opens....

Good luck! ?

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mxchic

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I swear....how irritating!!!! :banghead: I find myself the only girl in the group quite frequently but I have been pretty lucky. The few close guy friends I have that I ride with and train martial arts with, have pretty secure wives. When I ride my hubby is usually there and our group has a good time. Thank God...cause that is just freaking annoying. Who can deal with the bullshit of these stupid insecure women. Sorry if that sounds harsh. I have started racing this year with D-36 here in CA. I have been racing the beginning womens class and I have really met the nicest people. There are a lot of families who ride. The difference with these women is that they undersand the what it is to love riding. That's why they are all out there, so I just don't see that jealously crap. You should really check it out, even if you only make a couple races. Maybe you can meet some new people that you and your hubby can ride and camp with.

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Grand Master

DRZCatastrophe

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But since you're with your husband WHILE riding with them, why would they be so jealous?!? They (wives) don't have group relation in mind don't they? Its not like you were alone (not husband) with them or something, even then. :banghead:

I HAVE no FREAKING idea.

Actually I am chalking(?) a lot of it up to jealousy. Most are heavy, like 50lbs or so overweight. One that I used to get up at 5:30am to go walking with her can't even walk up a little itty bitty incline without GASPING and complaining about how HARD it is....Dang girl, I'M the one with FMS!!!

Anyway, some of it was that I think maybe some of the women were mad because I was there and they weren't. Or maybe they were told to stay home because it was a "guy" trip..(aka "please stay at home and don't ruin my weekend" trip.) These are the women who never go camping and can't stand to be dirty. They used to invite me on "girls" night out and all they wanted to talk about was kids, shopping and bash their men. (Please oh please may I stick a fork in my eye?) So I stopped going, definitely odd man out.

Anyway, I spent today depressed and took a long nap and am feeling better. I'm thinking of saying screw our finances and buy the damn bike. Or maybe I should REALLY screw the finances AND buy this!!! :banghead:?? hahahahahahahh!!1

http://www.blacksterlingfriesians.com/oneadmin/salehorsedetails.php?horse_num=458

Ok just kidding! I can't keep 'em in our single car garage!

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lilGirl

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I'm so disgusted I ALMOST don't want a bike anymore and want to hide out in my house and never talk to these people again. ALMOST. Damn them. Why should I have to give up what I like to do just to fit in???

DRZ Sell everything and move to Kelowna- I'll quit my job and we'll ride everyday :banghead:

My problem is that I'm still pretty new to the sport so probably alot of guys wouldn't want to ride with me anyway. My husband is too busy to ride and really, he's only interested in riding in Baja when we go there during the winter. He's fine with me riding with other guys because he realises I'm just looking for a riding buddy and I can't find any girls to go with. Boy, life would be so much easier if more girls rode. I'm trying to find gals to ride with but they're just plain rare. It seems like most women aren't interested in riding without their husbands, OR if their husbands are riding, they aren't interested in riding with me along. I left a message with a girl I met today at a race, let's see if she calls- doubt it.

This is the most frustrating sport I've ever come across to get "time on the bike". Between having to deal with work and family obligations, and finding riding partners, it's almost impossibe for me to find time to ride. I can see why people do ride alone but it's just plain not smart. I also now see why Motocross is more and more popular- you can go to the track by yourself. I, only the other hand, really like getting into the trails, the more trees the better.

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Grand Master

bigbob 901

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beautiful horse.

"That same old crowd was like a cold dark cloud that we could never rise above" - The Eagles circa 1976

you have to rise above this. something tells me you're deeply hurt by this betrayal and the now potential loss of your close knit gal/gal friendships. You want girlfriends too.

l2f can tell you this shit happens in the work day world too. So many of my better educated smarter women friends have told me the story how the receptionists and the admin gals befriended them at first at work but then when my friend either an engineer or in one case our new market development manager started acting with authority and meeting with the other managers, the girls in the pool started to let her know she was a traitor or some such crap.

YOU HAVE to go thru this......You can not change it or negociate your way around with these women. You have to build your OWN life the way you want it. You have to be a Knight for your right to be the person you have chosen to be. Be of strong heart and move forward.

my father also said something i did not understand when I was younger, he said "in the end you'll be lucky if you have one friend left".....look the point is friendships are frail and they do fall away over time, but your family and your soul are your responsibilty. Do not fear the loss of these women "friends"........keep riding, keep being YOU. :banghead:

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wes300

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Oh wow!!! Mean people suck!!! I am sorry you feel hurt...well you can ride with us IF you ever make it to Colorado. I ride with a good bunch of people, we are a mixed bunch, women and guys, some married, some not and some divorced. I guess we (I) are lucky to have support from home, my wife doesn't get jealous ( she doesn't ride), she has met everyone and know we all share one desire....RIDING!! Once I again, I am sorry that these people hurt you....Mean people really do suck. I hope your evening goes better....Shoot, call in sick tomorrow and go riding, sometimes a squid ride (solo ride) is good for the soul and heart.

I hope you feel better!!!!

Sincerely

WES

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