I feel your pain (pun intended). I broke my collarbone back in November. I was riding on a trail that was a whooped out and the bike got away from me and I clipped a tree with my right handguard. I high-sided and went over the handlebars. Hit the ground hard. My buddy who was with me knew immediately that I broke my collarbone since he broke his as a teenager. 10 mile ride on a bumpy road back to my truck and a 2 hour drive home in Sunday traffic then a ride to the ER from my wife. X-rays confirmed the broken collarbone, but the MRI showed that I cracked a rib that punctured my lung... I knew something was up when I would take a deep breath and heard weezing in my chest. They admitted me into the hospital for observation to make sure my lung healed up. I ended up spending almost 3 days in the hospital.
I started see a orthopedic doctor immediately after the crash. I wore a figure of 8 sling for about 2 months and would go back about once a month for x-rays. The x-rays showed some healing, but not to the level that I was happy with. The doctor said to give it more time and to only worry about it if it started hurting again. Not really the answer I was looking for. A friend of mine broke his collarbone in street bike crash a few years ago and told me to see another doctor and that I should insist on getting the surgery and getting it plated. He said after 4 months of not seeing much healing in his bone, they opted for the surgery.
I researched orthopedic surgeons in my area (Los Angeles) and found Kerlan-Jobe which is a pretty well-repected group of orthopedic surgeons here in LA. I made an appointment with one of their surgeons and when I went there, I had my mind made up that I wanted the surgery. The doc listened to my concerns and didn't stop me when I literally demanded that I get the surgery done. He said surgery is definitely an option, but there are pros and cons just like any other surgery. He told me he wanted me to get a CT Scan to really see if there was bone growth happening. He said regular X-rays aren't good at showing the initial stages bone calcification. I did the CT Scan and went back to see him a couple days later. Again, I had my mind set on getting the surgery done as I sat in the examination room. The doctor walked in and the first thing he said was "Good news, the CT Scan is showing bone growth." He showed me the scan and even with my untrained eye, I could see bone bridging the gap between the 2 ends of the broken bone. He said, "If it was my collarbone, I wouldn't do the surgery yet." He's a younger doctor who looks like he's in shape and leads an active lifestyle, so I definitely valued what he said.
He prescribed me a bone growth stimulator from Exogen which has a high success rate in helping heal bones that haven't healed on their own. I've been using it for about 2 months and the bone definitely feels more solid at the break site.
They will keep monitoring it and see how it progresses.
My advice is get the 2nd opinion and keep your spirits up. Surgery can always be an option down the road.